Barbara Cartland

July 9, 1901 – May 21, 2000

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[su_expand more_text=”Show More Quotes” less_text=”Show less” hide_less=”no” height=”90″ text_color=”#000000″ link_color=”#af0000″ link_style=”default” link_align=”left” more_icon=”” less_icon=”” class=””][su_quote style=”default”]Among men, sex sometimes results in intimacy; among women, intimacy sometimes results in sex.[/su_quote]

 

[su_quote style=”default”]After forty a woman has to choose between losing her figure or her face. My advice is to keep your face, and stay sitting down.[/su_quote]

[su_quote style=”default”]To sleep around is absolutely wrong for a woman; it’s degrading and it completely ruins her personality. Sooner or later it will destroy all that is feminine and beautiful and idealistic in her.[/su_quote]

[su_quote style=”default”]I have always found women difficult. I don’t really understand them. To begin with, few women tell the truth.[/su_quote]

[su_quote style=”default”]A historical romance is the only kind of book where chastity really counts.[/su_quote]

[su_quote style=”default”]A woman asking ‘Am I good? Am I satisfied?’ is extremely selfish. The less women fuss about themselves, the less they talk to other women, the more they try to please their husbands, the happier the marriage is going to be.[/su_quote]

[su_quote style=”default”]As long as the plots keep arriving from outer space, I’ll go on with my virgins.[/su_quote]

[su_quote style=”default”]A woman should say: ‘Have I made him happy? Is he satisfied? Does he love me more than he loved me before? Is he likely to go to bed with another woman?’ If he does, then it’s the wife’s fault because she is not trying to make him happy.[/su_quote]

[su_quote style=”default”]The right diet directs sexual energy into the parts that matter.[/su_quote]

[su_quote style=”default”]France is the only place where you can make love in the afternoon without people hammering on your door.[/su_quote][/su_expand]

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One of the most wonderful things I learned about while living in Britain, is Princess Diana‘s step-grandmother, Barbara Cartland.

 

 

Diana’s father was married to the most amazing looking Raine Spencer.  Diana referred to her as “ghastly” or “Acid Raine”.

Apple – Tree – not too far.

 

 

Barbara was a romance novelist.  As a child, Lady Diana Spencer considered those books among her favorites.

 

Boo.

 

Barbara’s signature was wearing pink.  Oh my God, the pink.  Pink pinkity pink.

 

She put Angelyne to shame.

 

 

 

Actually, everything puts Angelyne to shame.  Angelyne defines shame.

 

 

Cartland completed a book every two weeks, completing over 720 in her life and selling over 750 million over the period of her 300 years – fact some doubt.

 

 

This is Cartland dictating one of her many novels to her secretary Jean Smith.

 

 

This is Little Britain’s take on it.  I wish I could find a bette quality one, but this is a fair example.

 

 

Clive James described Dame Barabara’s eyes as, “Twin miracles of mascara, her eyes looked like the corpses of two small crows that had crashed into a chalk cliff.”

 

 

Cartland died in her sleep after “a short illness” in her home, Camfield Place in Hertfordshire.   Her sons were at her side.

She was placed in a cardboard coffin and buried on the grounds of her estate under a tree that was planted by Queen Elizabeth I.

 

Take a very dramatic trip to her grave.